1 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. (1 Corinthians 7:1-9 KJV)
Principles for Marriage
The apostle now begins to answer some moral and practical questions the Corinthians had asked him (1 Corinthians 7:1). Just as ministers are expected to provide sound guidance, believers are right to seek counsel from them. In the previous chapter, Paul warned against fornication; here, he gives guidance about marriage, which God has provided as a remedy for sexual immorality.
He starts by saying that, in their current situation, it was good for a man not to marry (1 Corinthians 7:1). This doesn’t mean that marriage is sinful or contrary to God’s will, but that celibacy can be preferable in certain circumstances—particularly during times of trial or distress—if the person has the gift of self-control and can remain chaste. This may also imply that Christians should avoid anything that stirs lustful desires and instead flee from them.
Still, Paul acknowledges that marriage is the proper way to avoid fornication (1 Corinthians 7:2). Therefore, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. Once married, both spouses should fulfill their marital duties to one another (1 Corinthians 7:3), because neither has exclusive authority over their own body; each gives that right to the other (1 Corinthians 7:4). Polygamy, adultery, and neglect of these duties violate the marriage covenant. Married couples should not deprive each other of intimacy, except by mutual consent and for a limited time devoted to prayer and fasting (1 Corinthians 7:5). Even then, they should reunite soon to avoid temptation due to lack of self-control. Avoiding lawful pleasures for too long can expose them to greater danger. God’s prescribed remedies for human weakness are always best.
Paul clarifies that he is not commanding everyone to marry (1 Corinthians 7:6). He speaks with permission, not as a binding rule. He personally wishes all were as he was—single and able to remain celibate (1 Corinthians 7:7). But he recognizes that not everyone has the same gift. God gives different people different strengths. Some are naturally inclined toward self-control, while others are not, and grace is distributed accordingly. Each person has their own gift from God.
He concludes with advice to the unmarried and widows: it is good for them to remain single, as he was (1 Corinthians 7:8). A single life has many advantages, especially in difficult times. But if they cannot control their desires, they should marry (1 Corinthians 7:9). It is better to marry than to burn with passion. Marriage, though it has its own challenges, is far better than struggling endlessly with lust.